- Why do we fall in love?
- Why do relationships fail?
- How do we revive the passion and hope?
Most people yearn for a committed love relationship in which they experience passion, connection, safety and full aliveness. For most of us the gateway to real love begins with infatuation which we call romantic love, with its excitement, energy and boundless joy. However, the experience of romantic love always changes and becomes less exhilarating.
“Real Love” can emerge when a couple decides to relate to each other according to their commitment to the relationship and when each partner gives to their Beloved what is needed in order to create the safety in which to risk the intimacy of being known.
Romantic Love gives a couple only a glimpse of the possibilities of “Real Love.” The journey to real love requires commitment, understanding the dynamics and stages of relationships and new ways of communicating and relating.
We specialize in working with couples who want this to be their relationship journey as well as with individuals who desire to be in a committed relationship.
"Real Love" is what is left over when
being in love has burned away.
Imago Relationship Therapy, a clinical model of couples psychotherapy developed by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., recognizes that the inherent nature of human beings is what Jung described as a "push towards wholeness". That wholeness contains Maslow's qualities of a self actualized person: spontaneity and creativity, acceptance of self and others, an ability to tolerate and even welcome uncertainty in life, a need to have both solitude and deep intense relationships, a sense of humor, caring and compassion for others, inner direction, and an open and fresh attitude toward life.
Throughout our development as human beings, that wholeness is fragmented, particularly through early experiences in relationships with our caretakers, and results in a very significant impact on both our choice of a marriage or relationship partner and the dynamics of all our adult relationships. The ultimate goal of the work that couples do in Imago Relationship Therapy is to assist each other in repairing the aspects of our original state (at birth) that have been wounded, injured, denied, disowned, or simply lost. The goal is thus to reclaim the full aliveness of our whole Self so that it can more passionately and vibrantly express itself in our life and in our relationships.
Imago Relationship Therapy, originating in the partnership of Harville and Helen (his wife of 25 years), integrates the seminal interpersonal insights of major Western psychological systems, behavioral sciences, and spiritual disciplines into a uniquely comprehensive theory of primary love relationships. Developed from the exclusive study of couples, it presents an approach that builds on and extends previous efforts.
The "Imago" is a composite image in the unconscious mind of the significant character traits and behaviors of childhood primary caretakers. By pairing us with an "Imago Match" - an individual who is like our caretakers in emotionally significant ways - our unconscious drives us to re-create our childhood psychological dynamics in an attempt to heal the central wounds we carry. The process of Imago Relationship Therapy is aimed at using this context to transform relationships into a therapeutic encounter and fuel for each partner's psychological and spiritual self-completion.
Imago Relationship Therapy utilizes a variety of clinical procedures to teach couples, and singles desiring an intimate union, to identify their defenses against intimacy and to understand the unconscious forces that influence partner selection and contribute toward flawed relationships. Goals of the therapy include: identifying frustrations rooted in primitive and illusory ideation of one's love partner; recognizing the failure of archaic behavior to gratify needs and achieve self-completion; and perceiving one's partner realistically without the encumbrance of one's own unconscious projections. Another important aspect of the Imago process involves learning new skills to help in gradually changing behaviors hurtful to one's partner. A core skill is a three-part dialogue that helps break out of self-centeredness and which promotes differentiation and compassion for the other. Therapy is ultimately made obsolete as each partner becomes a skilled advocate and "container" for the other's growth process. The Imago process, when consistently applied in any relationship, has the potential to be a transformative journey toward mutual healing and maturation.
Sep 12-14, 2008
(Houston)
Sep 26-28, 2008
(Galveston Island)
Oct 17-19, 2008
(Galveston Island)
Visit: www.continue2connect.com
Offering Advanced Imago Workshops by phone, Continue2Connect is a resource to support you as you continue your Imago journey, and deepen the connection with your partner, family, friends and colleagues.
